Oops, I Caved
by IsaacHayessoulgirl
Summary: The infamous duo is trapped. Will it bring them closer like Stimpy hoped or will stuff get weird?
1. Chapter 1

**Oops, I Caved**

**A/N: Well, the idea for this story is kinda cliché, but not to sound pompous, but I think I can make it really funny! Enjoy!**

**Chapter 1: Distance**

Stimpy woke up one morning. "Ah! Another lovely day! Rise and shine, Ren honey!" Ren rolled over in his sleep but continued snoring loudly. "C'mon, Ren! The day and viewing audience awaits!"

"Fuck you," He slurred. Stimpy sighed. "Okay, Ren." And he walked out of the bedroom, head hung. He waited hours for Ren to wake up. Bored, he lied on the couch.

FINALLY, at around ten, he woke up. "Um, Ren, can I talk to you?" He asked earnestly. "Yeah, Steempy?" He slurred… um, again. "I feel as is we've grown… distant lately, if you will, and I wanna fix it."

"We are _not _deestant!" Ren fought. "We're _extremely _close cousins!"

"Ren, we're dating."

"Oh, yeah. But we're not deestant!"

"Ren, I just want us to be happy together! And I think I know how!"

"Thees ees gonna be styoopid, eesn't eet?"

"We should go on a nature walk!"

"Are you stoned?"

"Uh-uh!" He giggled suggestively. "Look, jackass, I ain't goin' on some fruity-ass nature walk weeth youl! And-" Stimpy was dressed in all sorts of hiking clothes. Ren repeatedly hit his head on the wall. "And all thees stupidity because Stimply theenks we're deestant!"

"Stimpy! My name's Stimpy!" Ren began hitting his head again.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay, I forgot to mention that I would really like you to leave a review. PLEASE don't get me wrong, I LOVE getting favorited, but can you also leave a review if you read and like the story? It would be much obliged :) **

**Chapter 2: Failed Attempts**

Things, unfortunately, didn't end up like Stimpy had hoped. Things were really awkward. It was basically kind of like _Hello Goodbye, _because every time Stimpy said something positive, Ren threw back something negative. "So, Ren, isn't it great the sun's out? It's been raining fer days!"

"Eh, the sun's too hot. Besides, rain's good for the plants."

"So, uh… this walking's real good exercise!"

"What, are you saying I'm fat?"

"No, no! In fact, you've been losing lots of weight!"

"What are you saying, I have an eating disorder?"

"No! I mean you're slim!"

"Sleem? I am _sleem?"_

"Yep!"

"I am meat?"

"No, no! You're slim!"

"So I'm meat!"

"No, Ren, you're slim!"

"Oh, so I am a tightly packed piece of meat?"

"No, slim, like, ya know-"

"No, I do not know!" He got in his face. "I am a tightly packed, salty, fattening piece of artificial meat here for your nourishment and/or amusement?"

"But-"

"THAT'S EET!" And he started beating them up. For some reason, the Goodpigeons were in the trees. "This is the last time we attempt migrating!" Bobby said. "Yeah, but look at that jerk down there!" Yelled Pesto. "Takin' everything so literally! And just 'cause that guy called 'im slim! Who'd react that way?" Squit gave him a dirty look.

Luckily, Ren got less violent throughout the day, but alas, he was still oh so grumpy. Even after a picnic, which involved little conversation due to Ren's crankiness. It was like talking to Daggett in a bad mood: lots of odd sounds. "More ketchup, Ren?"

"Hyeh!"

Later, while walking on a steep hill, Ren tripped on a rock, and well:

Ren and Stimpy were on a hill,

Exhausting their weak limbs

Ren fell down,

Like a stupid clown,

And Stimpy went tumbling with him.

"Oh my God! Ren? Are you okay? Where are you?"

"Get.. your ass.. off… of my face."

"Oh. Sorry." He got up and helped Ren. "Ugh. I don't feel good. Thanks for the wasted day, Steempy. And eet's getting really dark." Stimpy could hardly blink back his tears. OF COURSE, it began to pour out of nowhere. "Look! There's a cave!" Ren grabbed Stimpy's had and they ran inside. All the rocks fell on them. "Ow! I can't move, Steempy!"  
>"Me neither, Ren!"<p>

"Hold on, I'll get the lighter so we can see eef you would GET YOUR FUCKING KNEE OUTTA MY CROTCH!"

"Sorry!"

"Ah. Here eet ees." He shined some light. "Oh my God… we literally can't move! We're surrounded by rocks!"

"Oh, dear."

"Okay, so we're stuck een a cave, we can't move, we have _no _idea where we are, and we have nothing to survive on! How can thees get any worse?" It got quiet until Stimpy remarked, "I hafta potty!"

"Grr!"


	3. Chapter 3

**Well, I hope at least people like this! I get no reviews! Oh well, just as long as I'm not writing these stories for my own health **

**Chapter 3: Cave Life**

"Okay, Steempy, now that we've built a rock freedge, a rock shower, rock furniture, and a rock toilet, what should we do next?"

"I know! A rock mailbox?"

"Genius!"

So Stimpy got to work on it.

**A fair amount of time later…**

"Hey Ren?"

"Huh?"

"It's almost dinner time, and there's no food!"

"Deed you check the rock freedge?"

"Yeah, and there's nothing!"

"Crap. I wonder where the next rock supermarket ees."

"We're living on a cave, Ren."

"Oh yeah. Hey, look! There's some food!"

"Ya mean those little bugs?"

"Mm-hmm!"

"But Ren… they're so tiny and innocent!"

"Are you _really _gonna defend a bunch of fuckin' bugs?"

"Hey, how'd you like it if some hire mammal tried to eat _you?"_

"Well, being as we don't leeve een Europe, I theenk I'm okay."

"But these bugs were here first!" Stimpy defended. Ren looked blank and then shrugged. "Ya snooze ya lose." He started gobbling them down ferociously. "Uh, Ren?" Stimpy tapped his shoulder. "For the last time-" Stimpy pointed to a corner of the cave which randomly had all sorts of vegetables hanging off trees. Ren spat out the bugs. "You son of a bitch, how _dare _you try 'n eat us!" They all beat him up. Ren had a black eye and all sorts of bruises. He twitched. Stimpy, not even caring, just remarked, "Huh. So much for innocent bugs."

So Stimpy somehow magically cooked up the vegetables. "So, what's for deener?" Ren sat excitedly as Stimpy brought him food to his rock couch, as they were gonna eat there together. "Steamed veggies, Ren!"

"Ugh! I can't stand that crap!"

"But Ren, yer gonna starve if you don't!"

"Ah, shut up, you."

"They're good fer you!"

"Shut up! Eef you theenk I'm gonna eat that crap-" Stimpy shoved a fork full in his face. "Say… that sheet ain't half bad!"

"Well, thank you, Ren!"

"Gimme more!"

"Okay!" They had a delightful time eating together.

As they slept that night, Ren hugged Stimpy in his sleep. Stimpy blushed and his heart pounded like it was Ringo playing _Helter Skelter._


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Cave Luuuuv**

**A/N: Yes, I had to spell 'love' the Isaac Hayes way!**

So Ren and Stimpy, despite their poverty, were happy because they had each other. Hey, Ren?"

"Hmm?"

"Wanna… have fun?"

"Damn, you beat me to eet!" And… yeah. Enough said.

Stimpy was cooking. Ren snuck up behind him. "Hi, honey! Can I help you cook?"

"Yes!" Stimpy's eyes got watery. "I THOUGH YOU'D NEVER ASK!" He hugged him tightly. "Anything for you, Steempy, babe. AHH!" His spine cracked because of Stimpy's intense hugs, but… holy crap! He didn't even give a damn due to the cave luv! So they had a sappy cooking montage. But hey, they did it together. Ren literally began to help around the house. As they settled down for bed, Ren said, "Hey Steempy?"

"Yeah, Ren?"

"Eef by _any _chance we never see the light of day again, wheech eesn't possible 'cuz we're gonna get the hell outta here sometime or another, I just want you to know eet's worth eet because I'm weeth you." Stimpy got those big ol' eyes and sniffed. "Ren Hoek, that is one of the _nicest _things you've ever said!"

"Thanks, hon. Well, goodnight, Steempy."

"Uh… I'm gonna go brush my teeth."

"Okay," Ren yawned. "Just no more rock puns. I _hate The Fleenstones."_

"Sure thing." He left the room and started pulling a Dib and talking to himself. "I didn't think 'a that! What if we get outta the cave and Ren won't love me anymore?" He looked out at Ren. "Come to bed, Steempy. I'm tired."

"I guess I'll worry about it when the time comes," He whispered. "Coming, Ren!" And he laid with Ren, and they fell asleep.

**A/N: Aren't they just adorable? XD**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Well, guys, I don't wanna spoil anything, but Stimpy makes a bad decision (AWWWWW SHYIT!)**

**Chapter 5: Discovery**

So that night Stimpy woke up for a drink. I don't how he got the liquid, but this show is tripping balls, so he did. But being the klutz he is, he tripped and hit a rock. "What the bad word?..." He moved the rock and holy shit! There was a way out! "I gotta tell Ren!" He exclaimed, but immediately stopped in his tracks. His words flew through Stimpy's head; "Can I help you cook?"

"Come to bed weeth me."

"I love you, Steempy."

"Gee, Ren, what do you wanna do tonight?"

"Same, theeng we do every night, Steempy- TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"

Stimpy blushed. "Whoops, wrong show. But still, I can't tell Ren! It'll tear us apart!" He started crying, snot dripping from his nose like his charming self. "This is the first _and _last time I lied to Ren! But we can't go back out there! He won't love me anymore!" He broke down crying. "Steempy, what's wrong?" He heard from the other room. "Are you okay, sweetheart?" Stimpy paused and put the rock back in its place. "I'm just fine, Re," He answered in a monotone voice.

**A/N: !**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Well, this chapter involves something Ren does on some occasions that I find really funny. DON'T MISINTERPRET THAT! XD Just kidding, even I am. Please enjoy!**

**Chapter 6: Stuff gets Weird**

So Ren fell for Stimpy's little lie. But two day, later, when he woke up, Ren wasn't next to him, and the cave was pitch black. "R-ren?" He questioned anxiously, "Where are you?" It suddenly lit up a little bit once more, and Ren's face was right there, only he had a long beard and bags under his eyes. Stimpy SCREAMED. "Ren?" He screamed, backing up. "What's going on? "

"We only have one match left, Steempy," He answered in his creepy voice . _I hadn't thought 'a that! _Stimpy thought, beginning to hate himself. "…And we can't make any movements," Ren added, "Or else we'll blow eet out.

"So-so whadda we do?"

"We lounge about, Steempy."

**A boring yet **_**really**_** creepy amount of time later…**

**A/N: Here comes one of my favorite parts of the shows: Ren's gibberish rants X)**

They were getting antsy. "Steempy! Shh! Don't talk!"

"Ren, I wasn't talking."

"Atta boy. I know eet's hard for you to be quiet. 'Cuz eef you talk… she'll hear eet!"

"Who?"

"She got angry weeth the villagers… but leettle does she know, they don't possess the gooseberries! The cookie had eet the _entire _time!" He started laughing psychotically. "And _then _what'll happen eef they find us? Weell eet be death by lilac… or worse- TORTURE BY PUG?" He started crying. "And eet's all because of… the gooseberries!"

"Oh no, not Ren's deranged rants!" But of course, the match blew out. "Ren? I'm scared! Help!"

"Love, luck and lollipops…" He answered. Stimpy reached for a rock and dropped it on Ren's head. "Ow! Where's the light?"

"Our last match that randomly exists blew out, Ren! And you started speaking all crazy again!"

"Well, what the hell are we gonna do?"

"Ren…. You won't hate me no matter what, right?"

"Of course! Eef I could see you, I'd geeve you a big hug!"

"Then… can I show you something?"

"Of course."

"Okay… let's go," He said shyly, scared of what Ren would think…


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: How's Ren gonna react? Stay tuned, and I'll see you in the next fan fic.!**

**Chapter 8: Break out**

"Are you ready, Ren?"

"Yes." Stimpy shakily uncovered the rock. "It's a way out. I'm sorry, Ren." He started crying. "I just wanted us to be close all the time!"

"Steempy, I am gonna keeck your fat ass!" Stimpy gulped. "But first, I wanna get outside for once n a long time!" He moved the rock so he could get out. "Ah! Good ol' sun-" It was pouring rain. "…Shine. Well, I guess we'll be running home een the rain."

"But honey, shouldn't we just 'til the rain stops? I can hardly see past it!"

"Steempy, we don't know when thees sheet'll stop! Besides, how do I know you won't just purposely lock us in here?" Stimpy looked ashamed. "Come on, styoopid! Let's go!" He took his hand and the RAN. "Ren, look! A shed!"

"Alright!"

They ran inside. "This is a lot better," Stimpy panted. "Agreed, " Ren panted back. But when they were just getting comfy, a strange voice said, "Hey, hey hey. Stay outta my shed, okay?" (For all you .MOV fans!) They SCREAMED and ran out.

They were barely protected under a tree. "Waita go, jackass! Now we're stranded een these crappy woods weeth hardly any shelter!"

"I just wanted us to be together! You're the one always abandoning me!" (Ooh! Someone's gettin' fei-stay!)

"You lied, you jackass, and look where eet got us!"

"Oh, like you've never lied to me?" Ren remained silent. "Yeah, that's what I thought! This is why I hid the way out of the cave from you! 'Cuz I knew the second we got outta that cave, you'd treat me horribly again and we'd be torn apart! The show's about the two of us, Ren! It's not called _The Ren Show, _ it's _The Ren & Stimpy Show!_ And not just 'cuz it sounds better, but also because it's about the two of us!"

"Steempy… I'm so sorry! Look, I promeese when we get home that I'll hang out weeth you a lot more! I love you! I just want both of us to leeve, okay?" And at that minute, the sun came out. They blushed and held hands all the way home.

**Stay tuned for **_**Commentary with the Stars!**_


	8. Chapter 8

**Commentary with the Stars**

***Jessikuh's sitting in a chair.***

**Jessikuh: **Where the _hell _are Stimpy and Ren?"

***The Good Feathers fly in and sit on another chair.***

**Jessikuh: **What are you guys doing here?

**Bobby: **Ren and Stimpy went out for dinner, and they said to cover for 'um, so badda-bing, badda-boom, here we are.

**Jessikuh: **Well, okay! Thanks for your guest appearance in today's story!

**Squit: **Hey, no problem!

**Pesto: **Da camera cooin' loves us, right, fellas?

**Bobby & Squit: **Coo, yeah!

**Squit: **Wow, Pesto, you sure are cool!

**Pesto: **Whaddo you mean by that?

**Squit: **Wull, I just said that yer cool!

**Pesto: **I am an _Eskimo? _ Is that it? Is that what'cher sayin'?

**Squit: **No, Pesto, I'm just saying you're cool!

**Pesto: **I'm cool? Yer sayin' I'm _cool?" _

**Squit: **Yeah, that's it!

**Pesto: **So I am a cool home in the Antarctic?

**Squit: **No! Cool, like, ya know-"

**Pesto, getting in his face: **No, I do not know! I am some icy home built by and made for an Eskimo that used ice blocks here for your amusement?

**Squit: **No!

**Pesto: **DAT'S IT**! *He starts beating Squit up.***

***God Pigeon enters***

**Bobby: **Guys, it's the God Pigeon!

***All three and Jessikuh kiss his feet.***

**God Pigeon: *Questionable sounding gibberish***

**Bobby: **The God Pigeon says this fan fic. Is over.

**Everybody: **'Bye!

**Jessikuh: **Thanks and see you next time!


End file.
